How to speak so people actually listen

It’s been a while since I’ve written for Let’s Talk.

Part of the reason is that I’ve been busy with client work.

But the main reason is I got married last month, so the months leading up to it I was focussed on that – and then I was on my honeymoon to Hawaii (first time – loved it).

Anyway, you may not care about the ins and outs of my life. But I wanted to let you know why I’ve been away – and to say I’m back.

The format will be a little different, though.

Since I talk about the need for speeches and presentations to be Clear, Convincing, and Conversational, I’ve decided to make Let’s Talk more conversational.

From now on it will be a daily email.

Of at any time it’s too much or it’s not for you, just click the unsubscribe button at the bottom of every email.

With that said, today I’d like to tell you a story.

It’s a tale of disappointment. But don’t worry, there’s a silver lining in the end.

You see, I have this challenge for myself; whenever I go to a new country, I learn the language of that country to a conversational level.

It’s a fun and motivating way to expand my linguistic abilities.

And, usually, you get on better with the locals when you speak the lingo.

But back in 2019, I had a paper accepted for a conference in Amsterdam, two months later.

Now, my last name is Dutch – but I didn’t know a word of it.

But I got to work – and by the time I arrived I was actually conversational.

So far so good.

I was pretty excited to speak the language, but I was ultimately disappointed.

Why?

Simple: with very few exceptions, as soon as I walked into a restaurant or bar, they greeted me in English.

It was nice in the sense of easy – but it was pretty disappointing. I mean, who wants to be that pretentious wanker who insists on responding in a different language?

So yeah, it was disappointing.

At first.

But then I noticed something: the same restaurant owners greeted the French and Italian in English too.

In fact, one morning I was at a café eating breakfast, and these three different tables – one French, one German, one Italian – who didn’t know each other, started talking. Eventually the owner joined in.

And they all spoke in English.

Now, I did get the chance to speak Dutch. So that was good. And it’s my understanding that if I’d had the chance to leave Amsterdam, there would have been much less English-speaking.

So the story here is not ‘hey everyone speaks English.’

The story is that English – in this case – was the lingua franca. It was the one language that the restaurant owner knew most people who walked through his door were likely to speak.

And there’s a pretty good lesson here for communication:

You can dive deep in learning the specific ‘language’ of a topic.

And, to an extent – you should.

But the reality is, we already all speak a universal ‘basic’ language. And if you can cut through the crap and communicate your ideas in that language, you’ll reach more people.

You’ll have more impact.

To put it bluntly:

Talk in your audience’s language.

But a caveat to that is to talk in the language that maximises your audience’s understanding.

Food for thought.

Talk soon,

Alexander

P.S. I’m expanding my client list at the moment, so I have space for 3 new clients next month. If you or anyone you know needs expert help in strategic communications, presentations, or speeches, reach out via email at [email protected]